With the improvements in today’s health care, society has to care for more and more elderly people. Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed?

Recently, the development of

economy

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the economy

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and health facilities has been increasing

human

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the human

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life expectancy index.

Therefore

, the citizens must be ready to take

care

more

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of more

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older

people

.

This

essay

however

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,however

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, will discuss the

unability

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inability

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of society to conquer

this situations

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this situation
these situations

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and the comprehensive solutions to resolve them.

First

and foremost, in the globalization

era

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,era

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the increase of elderly

people

will definitely reduce the productivity of citizens because the social proportion of young and old

generation

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generations

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is not equal.

For

example

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,example

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the

statictics

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statistics

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produce in Japan, that 60% of their population is in the range of 60 years old above.

This

means the young generation will

probabbly

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probably

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not

enough

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be enough

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to take

care

all

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of all

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particular

Correct article usage
the particular

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needs of their old family.

Moreover

, in the tight

economy

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economic

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competition, the productive generation must be

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a concern

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concern

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concerned

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on

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about

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their work in order to preserve

thier

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their

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income. In

Japan

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,Japan

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people

work

averagely

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an averagely

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10

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of 10

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hours per day, which

totaly

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totally

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resulting

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results

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that they will not able to take

care

of old

family

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families

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all time.

Despite those

chalanges

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challenges

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, several

alternative

Change to a plural noun
alternatives

The singular countable noun alternative follows the quantifier several, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

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can be implemented in order to maintain social

live

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life

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and

economy

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economic

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development.

Establishment

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The establishment

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of social

care

foundation will be beneficial for

productive

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a productive

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family.

For instance

in Indonesia, there are

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a non
the non

The noun phrase non governmental organization seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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non governmental

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non-governmental

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organization

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organizations

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who

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that

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can provide family helpers to take

care

their

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of their

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old family while

thier

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their

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family members still working.

Secondly

, the other family members who are not employed

such

as

brother

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brothers

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in law or

cousin

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cousins

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can be the other options.

This

action will provide not only

comfortable

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a comfortable

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zone for grandmother/grandfather

,

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apply

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but

also

will give a chance for them to work.

In conclusion,

people

proportion and

economy

presure

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pressure

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are the main

problem

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problems

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why the society is unable to assist

thier

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their

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old family member. In my

opinion

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,opinion

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the establishment of

social

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a social

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foundation and employed helpers from other family members will

extremely

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be extremely

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beneficial to help them comprehensively.

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